Mourning Becomes Celebration

Zain
4 min readAug 24, 2021

Life is so unpredictable, incomprehensible, and never the same as we fantasize. I never thought that there would be a time when I would be the same as I wanted and desired. I guess nobody does. For me, life got off on the wrong foot. It was never a bed of roses for me, not even close. Maybe a bed of nails?

Life was harsh, living was harsh. Every day was a never-ending cycle. I got up, got ready, did my work, and repeat. There was no respite. I was stuck in this mentally exhausting whirlwind that was life. It sucks the life and blood out of you. I might sound macabre but one can’t help but feel disillusioned when nothing goes your way. Docility, appreciation, care, and all the relevant words started becoming obscure and meaningless.

I knew and believed that nothing remained the same forever, that things changed and people changed and life begins anew. Hope was a fickle thing, it kept me going, gave me the drive when I had none. Even when I felt like ending things. But I guess the powers up above had some changing of the heart.

My parents passed away when I was in the elementary level. Since then, I started to question nature, why me? I became so pessimistic that I started to lose faith in God. I was certainly a burden to my parental uncle and aunt. There was no love lost. I was a burden that the world dumped on them. To them, I was just a stranger. In a way, I was, because the only connection between them and me, my parents, was gone and with that their responsibility as well.

I was studying aeronautical physics and it was almost the last year of my university. It was such an unfortunate day. Amazing considering it should have been one of the joyous days of my life.

My guardians had arranged my marriage with an unknown person. I was to be married within a month of getting my degree.

It was a shock. I was ambitious dedicated and ready to take the world head-on. Ready to spread my wings and live life on my own terms. Free from the grim shadows that were my uncle and aunt. Again, my stars had dealt me a blow.

Their decision for me to get married was very heart-wrenching. They didn’t care about my dreams. All they wanted was to get rid of me. Eventually, I was married to a well-off man, having all the luxuries to spend a happy…

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Zain

Software Engineer. I write thought provoking articles, you decide my niche!